Introducing Top Five Fridays

Top Five Things to do When You Can’t Sleep

In the movie High Fidelity, the main character goes around spouting off top five lists of everything from music to lovers. So I thought to myself, hey why not take this approach myself and create a Top Five Fridays loosely based on this movie. So without further ado here is the first Top Five based on my night last night, enjoy.

1. Watch really bad TV. VH1 and Bravo are good sources to watch countless reality reruns of shows you probably have already watched countless of times. Infomercials also provide a good source of entertainment value, particularly fitness infomercials that promise miraculous weight loss in 10 days or your money back. I mean hello, if you don’t lose 10lbs in 10 days you get your money back…brilliant!
   
2. Think about your financial situation nonstop and determine the next steps to create an awesomely awesome nest egg in the next 10 years. Plan includes keeping track of recent spending and eliminating the obvious frivolous recent shopping that includes over priced shoes and random infomercial purchases of fitness products. Extra bonus points for firing up the laptop that takes 15 minutes to boot up to create a financial plan on excel with a fancy timeline on PowerPoint.
   
3. Do pushups. Keep a tally of how many boy pushups you can do vs. girl pushups because nothing really relaxes more than getting your heart pumping by doing physical exercise…sweet. Need some extra relaxation? Try doing hundreds and roll ups for kicks.
   
4. Change the already changed sheets on your bed because you need the extra thread count, regardless of the thread-count you have, in order to sleep better Sleeping on 300 (ewe, but I guess not everyone’s skin is as sensitive as mine so no judgment)? Maybe switch to 500. Sleeping on 500? Maybe go crazy and go to a 1,000 count (yay!). Also, not all cotton is made the same so really feel free to experiment with your closet full of expensive sheets, I know I do.
   
5. Once your done with steps 1-4 crawl into your freshly made bed and turn off the lights. Then immediately start thinking about natural disasters and how you might die from them. My personal favorite are earthquakes, nothing screams sleepy time like imagining a pile of wrecked metal as you gasp for air underneath it. Note to self: certain people may not appreciate a “omg I think I might die in an earthquake tonight” phone call in the middle of the night. If you do decide to make a call make sure it is to someone who has your same sick morbid sense of humor.